Friday, February 8, 2008

I Hate the Cat, I Hate the Dog....Oh wait, they're o.k. now

As I was walking through the bedroom this morning, I was awoken from my morning stupor by the cold, wet sensation of cat, hair-ball puke slipping under my barefoot. I was surprised at how calm I remained as I scraped the offensive goop from between my toes and dutifully returned to clean the carpet.

It then dawned on me that I have finally stopped hating our pets.

"Hating your pets? How could you!?", you may ask, but it was not always that way and I now believe that I have come full circle.

When Corby and I were a child-free couple, we had many cats. One summer, after a litter of kittens were born, we housed seven cats. Over the years we gave a few away and some ran away, but we always had 2 or 3 at least. The cats were our children, until I became pregnant for the first time.

While pregnant, I was surprised at how quickly our beloved cats went from fluffy balls of love to the most disgusting things in the world. The cat hair, cat puke, cat litter and the occasional "your laundry basket looks just like my litter box" accident all offended me to the point of wanting to get rid of all of the cats.

After Elora was born, things seemed to settle down a bit. I think that cats can sense stress and really don't like the sound of a baby crying, so generally they all gave me a wide berth. The only remaining annoyance was that all those cozy, soft baby blankets looked just as cozy and soft to all of the cats. Countless times I would find a stack of newly washed baby items (we had no washer and dryer, so we used a laundromat) covered in cat hair, and that usually sent me over the edge.

About four years later, living in a new house with a fenced yard, we decided to get an adorable puppy for our two children. Things were good for a while until I became pregnant with our third child. No one tells you that while pregnant you have a increased sensitivity to odor. I didn't even want to be in the same room with our dog now, who had grown to a hefty 70 pounds. It didn't help that our 1200 square foot house was beginning to seem a bit cramped.

After Jacob was born, the amount of dog hair shed around the house quickly became the bane of my existence. Dog hair gravitates and adheres to snuggly, terrycloth baby sleepers especially as the baby squirms and crawls across the floor. I must admit that I am not the best house-keeper in the world, but the amount of hair our dog could produce was no match for our vacuum, in fact, we went through two vacuums during this time.

I eventually trained our very smart, obedient dog, who had in many ways become the neglected step-child of the family, to not go into certain rooms of the house. Things were better because the hair wasn't everywhere, but when I became pregnant with our fourth child, I seriously thought that we should consider making the dog an "outside pet".

Finally, a year and a half ago, we finally upgraded our house to one double the size. We now have about 2200 sq.ft. and a large fenced back yard. The dog stays in the kitchen and entry hall even though there are no gates to keep him out of the other rooms (I think that he has incurred my wrath over the years enough to know that it is better to stay under the radar). We have only one cat now, because when we moved our other cat decided to run away and return to our old house. We retrieved her once, but she ran away again and we couldn't find her thereafter.

The pet situation has settled down now, but I guess it was never really a "pet situation" at all. I mean, the rest of the family always maintained a loving, fair relationship with all of the animals in the house. I suppose it was my crazy prenatal or postpartum hormones that made me so animal intolerant.

If you take a minute to think about it, there is probably a primal explanation.

I imagine that in primitive societies, animals posed a serious threat to a new baby. Those domesticated wild dogs and feral cats that kept company with the cavemen would surely not think twice about picking off a tiny human if times were tough and they were hungry. Perhaps my abhorrence of animal odor and my desire to protect the children from a mass of pet hair is only a latent remnant of an innate instinct for survival.

What do you think?


Blub-blub is a 13-year-old, striped tabby who sometimes forgets to keep her tongue inside her mouth and Nog-dog is a rotund, five-year-old, pound-puppy.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

You Know You're a Parent When...

You are painfully aware of the futility of trying to maintain or repair ANYTHING in a room shared by young boys.

This torn wallpaper is actually worse behind the dresser! I probably would have taken it a lot harder had I been the one to decorate this room, but it came this way when we bought our house. It will serve until the boys are old enough to want to change it.
Notice that this ceiling fan is not only missing a blade, but it's light globe is also long gone.We should have known better than to put the boys' bunk-bed under the fan, but the room is pretty square and it was going to be within reach where ever we put it. The popcorn ceiling is also a daily casualty of the bunk-bed. Those little white buggers are all over the place; you would think it was snowing indoors!

Postscript: One of our three sons is solely responsible for the wallpaper, ceiling fan blade and the ceiling popcorn removal (breaking the light globe was a joint effort). Those of you who know our boys can probably guess which one has done all of this damage, those of you who don't know our sons can refer to this post to draw your own conclusion.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Take These Broken Dreams!

Christmas, a Florida vacation and then the flu, I certainly have not been able to keep-up with everything with so much disruption in life. So, it came as no surprise to me when strange movies began to appear in the mailbox as a result of a long, neglected Netflix Que.

Haven't we all done this before?

I am sure at some point in my Netflix organizing, I had a good reason to put The Secret of My Success in my que, but I can't seem to remember why!

Watching a few of these golden oldies from the eighties got me to thinking about how our culture used to view the corporate business world as compared to today.

Secret of My Success, Trading Places, Working Girl, Wall Street, Baby Boom, just to name a few, are all examples of the idealism in which we once viewed the suit-and-tie, corporate boardroom lifestyle. Hollywood told us that anyone could make a fortune in the business world with just a little common sense and an assumed identity!

Do they even make movies like this anymore? I am hard pressed to think of any modern movies that similarly create the illusion of a "Get Rich Quick" corporate world.

What kind of fortune making schemes do Americans aspire to today? My best guess is that young people have transferred their adoration of the yuppie business world, to an adoration of celebrity life. Movies released over the past decade often revolve around the lives of celebrities, some fictionalized, for example: Notting Hill, Almost Famous, Americas Sweethearts, and American Dreamz. Not to mention television reality shows like American Idol.

In both of these cases, whether it is in a corporate office or on a stage, singing in front of thousands, the general theme is that fame and fortune can be easily acquired.

Isn't that the whole underlying idea that appeals to us lazy Americans?

Americans want it all, but they shouldn't have to work too hard or sacrifice anything.


Here is my list of 80's Businessman Get Rich Quick & Easy Movies
  1. Wall Street
  2. Trading Places
  3. Risky Business
  4. Working Girl
  5. Secret of My Success
  6. Baby Boom
  7. Big Business
  8. Big
  9. Mr. Mom (Teri Garr is a mom turned tuna fish advertising genius)
Please let me know if I forgot any!!

Monday, January 14, 2008

Back to Life, Back to Reality

We are all trying to get back into our normal routine this morning after spending last week in Florida, camping and visiting Disney World. We all had a wonderful vacation; thank-you to Grandma and Grandpa Holland for the perfect Christmas gift!

Eight of us shared a campsite in the Disney park at their Fort Wilderness and we visited 3 of their 4 theme parks: Epcot, Animal Kingdom and Magic Kingdom. The weather was beautiful, the crowds were light, the lines were short and the food was delicious (just ask my bathroom scale!).

Now I am beginning the difficult task of getting everything back into functioning order here at home. The kids have resumed their schoolwork this morning and there is swim practice and theater later this afternoon. There was very little downtime during our holiday break and this morning I have had to hit the ground running despite feeling a little groggy and hungover from the excess of fun and relaxation.

Here are some pictures from our visit. Enjoy!

Corby and the kids ride to the swimming pool with Grandma

We were surprised by how much Henry loved the Disney Characters
Grandpa and Elora riding the bus back to camp for the little boys' naptime.The boys wait for the Epcot fireworks showI think the little boys ended up riding this over 10 times.All the kids loved Thunder Mountain Railroad, although Jacob did not want to ride it again because it was too wild. (click this photo for a better look at Jacob's expression!)

Friday, January 4, 2008

The Case of The Smelly Trash Cans

During the course of an average day at home with four young children, there are often strange mysteries that arise. Parents must often tap into crime-solving skills residually learned from watching the X-files, Law & Order and perhaps even the Spielberg classic Young Sherlock Holmes.

Each day I am left wondering:
Where did this come from? Who started this fight? How is this getting so dirty? Why does this keep getting moved? What is this thing?
One of my proudest moments as a mommy sleuth involved a cellphone that had been missing for a few days (long enough to lose its charge) and a curious light left on in a closet. With no adult explanation for why the coat closet light was on, I knew that something was not quite right. After digging way back under a nest of jackets I discovered a three-year-old's cache of stolen items to rival any pirate's buried treasure, cell phone included.

While I do spend most of my time trying to deduce who, what, when, where and how, there are rare times when I get to witness a criminal in the act. Last night was one of those nights.

A few days ago, my suspicions had been aroused when I noticed that our bathrooms were particularly pungent. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not a great house keeper and with so many little boys in the house, there is usually a urine smell that underscores the overall odor of the two bathrooms that the kids use. But this smell was particularly strong, so I checked for the usual culprit, urine soaked underwear left on the floor after an accident. I found no such thing - Hmmmm, curious.

I noticed the following day that the trash can seemed out of place, but only a bit. Very suspicious.

Last night I was really clued in when I found the bathroom trash far from its cubby next to the toilet, in fact, it was in the middle of the floor. Upon further investigation, I discovered that there was pee (and a whole lot of it) filling the trash. AH-HA!

My oldest son was getting ready for his bath and I immediately went into my line of questions.
Me - "Have you been peeing in the trash can?"

Corbin - "I don't think so. Maybe when I wasn't paying attention."
(Corbin has a very short attention span, and I sometimes find him in the bathroom, totally engrossed in something, with his pants down, oblivious as to why he even went in there!)

Me -
"This isn't a little bit of pee. This isn't an accident. I don't think you could have done this without paying attention."
While questioning my first suspect I had little time to pay much attention to our second oldest boy who had trotted into the bathroom to get undressed for his bath. In mid-interrogation, with the smoking-gun trashcan right in front of me, Jacob walked right up to it and calmly began to pee in the trash like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Caught in the act!!!

Looking back, I can relate to the gratification felt by wildlife biologists who spend years studying animals and then finally witnessing something never seen before.
"Researchers have long speculated about the wild gorilla's mating habits, but now for the first time in history, scientists have seen...."

This morning, Jacob proudly exclaimed, "Mom! Mom! I went to the bathroom and I didn't use the trashcan!" I am so proud.

So, The Case of The Smelly Trash Cans has been closed (yes, trashcan is plural, this was happening in more than one). But despite getting a full confession, I never was able to ascertain a motive. Why was Jacob peeing in the trashcans? We may never know.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Sweeney Todd at Monaco Pictures

There is a brutal, uncomfortable cold making its way around our house. Henry has already had it and I am on my second day of stuffiness. Corby is just beginning to feel sick. We almost canceled plans we had made to go out last night, but at the last minute we decided to go ahead and see a movie.

We have been wanting to visit the new Monaco Pictures at Bridge Street in Huntsville, so we decided to go "all out" and paid online for the VIP balcony seats ($12 per ticket+$2 online fee). It was neat ordering on their website because their balcony seats are numbered and assigned just like in a playhouse. We choose AA4 and AA5.

Though this was the first time I had ever been to Bridge Street, I really didn't get to walk around much because, as usual, we were running a bit late for the movie. I could see the lit Carousel and bridge from where we parked, but I didn't see much else. I will go back for shopping some other time.

Monaco Pictures was definitely a unique theater experience. Downstairs in the lobby was a restaurant with a huge bar that glows red from underneath. An outside seating area included two fire places surrounded by modern, IKEA style sofas. A huge staircase winds toward the door, and upstairs is the Prive VIP area.

We made our way upstairs where we found another lit bar (this time blue) surrounded by more lounge-type furniture. We each ordered a drink, popcorn and Corby was a bit hungry so he ordered an appetizer-like chicken dish. All of this is allowed in the theater, even the alcohol (all of the upstairs seats are for ages 21 years and older) and since we were a bit late we went right in.

The seats in the balcony give you a large amount of leg room and the leather rockers are much wider than normal movie seats. Because we didn't quite know how to pick our seats, we were seated with a little wooden table between us, but if we had planned it right, we could have sat with a movable armrest in between us that would convert our seats into a love seat.

Overall, we had a great time. We saw Sweeney Todd, which we both loved, but would certainly not recommend to everyone.

After all was said and done, we ended-up spending around $60, which is actually about twice what we usually spend for a night at the movies. Next time we will try the "cheap seats"at $9 each, my guess is they will be just as good.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Long time, no blog!

It has been such a long time since I last blogged! I must admit, feel a little guilty for petering out during the school year, but we have been very busy. Starting today, the kids are officially "off" from school for Christmas and I have a little more time than usual. Also, all of the kids' activities are on holiday hiatus, so that means no swim practice, dance class, theater, chess club, scout meetings or soccer. Hooray!

I still have much to do to get ready for Christmas and our upcoming trip to Florida. I have to report that (again) our family yearbooks will not be finished in time for gift giving, but I assure you that I am still working on them and will make sure everyone who wants one gets one. (For those of you who are wondering what the yearbooks are, just imagine a year-in-review magazine featuring just our family.)

A few topics to note:

Elora and Corbin did very well in their first scholastic team chess tournament this school year. Corbin's primary team (K-3) finished in third place overall and Elora won every single one of her games, despite it being her first year in the elementary bracket (4-6) plus she played first board.

The boys had their first theatrical performance last weekend and I must say that they did a great job. The director was a little nervous about what the outcome would be, seeing that Jacob tried to play duck-duck-goose on stage during the dress rehearsal, but fortunately he pulled through for the actual performance.

Corbin as Sniffwhiskers and Jacob as Tripalong in The Mouse That Didn't Believe in Santa Clause

Corby and I were able to attend the annual Margarita Ball at the VBCC this November. This is a charity event that collects Toy-for-Tots in exchange for a night of dancing, food and free margaritas. Since we almost never get to spend a night out together, this was a real treat. Thanks to those who made it possible with tickets and babysitting!

Before leaving for our night on the town

A brief Holiday warning:
For those of you visiting us for Christmas, I just wanted to warn you that our Christmas tree experienced a near topple, multiple items volleyed into it (mostly shoes by Jacob) and a near fire (Corbin playing with the lights) all in the first week of putting it up. It has since had three strands of lights go out (I was able to replace two with solid blue strands we had on hand, but the third is still out), and the bottom branches are sagging nearly to the floor. Yes, Christmas is still on as planned, but you will have to excuse the half-lit monstrosity in the corner. It is still standing, but it does look the worse for wear.

Lastly, I have received a few comments that I perhaps should lay off the political blogs, and I apologize for sometimes voicing my opinion so loudly. I am thinking about starting a separate blog for such ideas. In all likelihood, it would just sit idle most of the time, but when that disgruntled political mood stuck me, I would have a place to release it! Does anyone have any comments or suggestions? What do you think?

Corbin and Jacob riding the Ron Paul float in the Madison Christmas Parade.